c/food-hot-takes

Can we talk about how people ruin a good steak with fruit marinades

I was at a cookout last weekend in Phoenix and this guy soaked a ribeye in pineapple juice for like 4 hours. By the time it hit the grill the meat was all mushy and weird. I get wanting flavor but that enzyme breaks down the protein too much. Has anyone else had a marinade totally wreck a cut of beef like that?

Got dragged to a fancy tasting menu place and left hangry

My sister made me go to this $200 a person place in Portland last Saturday called something like 'Root and Stone'. Tiny portions, 12 courses, took almost 4 hours. One course was literally a single radish on a rock with some foam on it. I ate a whole bag of chips from the gas station on the way home. The whole thing felt like a joke where you're the punchline. I don't get how people rave about this stuff when a decent burger and fries hits way harder for way less. Anyone else feel like these tasting menus are just for bragging rights?

My homemade pizza was a total fail until I switched to a steel plate instead of a stone

I spent about 2 years trying to get that crispy bottom crust with a pizza stone and never got it right. The stone would heat up unevenly and my dough would stick or burn in spots. Finally I grabbed a 1/4 inch thick baking steel from a restaurant supply store for $40. First try had a perfectly browned crust with that nice chew in about 6 minutes. Anyone else made the switch and noticed a big difference?

The time I tried to perfect fried rice and took 8 batches to get it right

I've been cooking for years and always thought fried rice was easy. But my rice always came out mushy or clumpy. Last Sunday I decided to actually figure it out. I kept notes on every batch I made. It took me 8 separate attempts and 4 cups of rice before I got that restaurant texture. The secret was using day-old rice spread on a baking sheet in the fridge for 2 hours. I also stopped crowding the wok and cooked everything in tiny batches. Has anyone else spent way too long chasing a simple dish that should have been obvious?

Can we talk about how overrated truffle oil is?

I was at a dinner party last Saturday and my friend poured truffle oil over a pasta dish she spent 2 hours on. I took one bite and it just tasted like that fake earthy chemical flavor. I get that people think it's fancy but it's literally just a synthetic compound called 2,4-dithiapentane. Has anyone else noticed restaurants using it as a crutch to make basic food seem gourmet?

The week every lunch tasted like dish soap

Last Tuesday my avocado toast tasted like soap. Then Wednesday the same with my eggs. By Friday I realized it was the new cutting board. I got it from a friend in Portland and soaked it too long in vinegar water. Anyone else ruin a whole week of meals with one bad kitchen move?

I tried the famous cronut from that bakery in New York and it was just okay

I waited in line for 45 minutes at Dominique Ansel Bakery last month to finally try their original cronut. It was pretty and sweet, but honestly, it just tasted like a fancy donut to me, not some life-changing pastry. Has anyone else had a super hyped food that didn't live up to the wait or price for them?

Just realized how overrated fancy toast is after a trip to Austin

I went to a cafe there that charged $14 for avocado toast with edible flowers. It was fine, but honestly, my own kitchen version is just as good for a fraction of the price. Does anyone else think we've hit peak toast hype?

Vent: I chose a gas station burrito over a fancy brunch spot in Austin

My friends wanted to wait an hour for avocado toast at some trendy place on South Congress. I ducked into a Valero station and grabbed a $4.99 chorizo and egg burrito instead. It was hot, greasy, and honestly better than any $18 plate I've had there. Does anyone else think we overhype sit-down breakfast places?

A thing I saw at a new food hall in Austin about plating

I was at that new food hall on South Congress last weekend... and every single plate from the fancy spots looked the same. Tiny portions on big white plates with a swoosh of sauce and one lonely herb on top. It felt like they cared more about how it looked on Instagram than if you'd actually leave full. I paid $18 for three scallops and a smear of puree. Has anyone else noticed this style taking over, or is it just me?

My local pizza place swapped from canned mushrooms to fresh ones and the whole vibe changed

For years, their pepperoni pizza had those rubbery canned mushrooms that tasted like nothing, but about three months ago they started using thick-cut fresh portobellos. Now the pizza has this earthy, meaty flavor that actually stands up to the pepperoni instead of just being a wet, gray blob. Has anyone else noticed a simple ingredient switch that totally flipped a dish from 'meh' to a must-order?

My local diner's 'famous' chili cheese fries are a total letdown

I had to choose between their chili cheese fries and a classic bacon cheeseburger last Friday. I went with the fries because everyone online raves about them, but they were just a soggy, lukewarm mess for $14. Has anyone else tried them and gotten a decent batch, or should I just stick to the burger?

Just dropped $25 on a jar of fancy truffle salt and it's the biggest scam in my kitchen

Saw it at the specialty market, thought it would make my scrambled eggs taste like a million bucks. Used a pinch, tasted like I licked a sweaty gym bag that someone spilled salt on. Tried it on popcorn, fries, even a steak, same weird fake earthy funk every time. The jar is just sitting there now, mocking me from the spice rack. For that price I could have bought three whole chickens. Anyone else get burned by a 'gourmet' ingredient that just tastes awful?

I hit 50 different hot sauces in my collection and it made me realize something

I mean, I just counted them all last week, and I have over 50 bottles now. It hit me that maybe 90% of them are just vinegar with chili powder and food coloring, and they all taste basically the same. Has anyone else built up a big collection of something food-related only to find most of it is just hype?

My cousin from Phoenix said putting ketchup on a hot dog is a culinary crime, but I've been doing it since I was 5.

He called it 'ruining a perfectly good sausage' and now I'm questioning a core part of my cookout identity, so is he right or just a condiment snob?

Unpopular opinion: I tried putting ketchup on my mac and cheese last week and it was actually good

I finally tried that fancy olive oil everyone talks about and my regular stuff is better

My sister gave me a $40 bottle of single-origin Italian olive oil for my birthday. I used it for a week on salads and bread. Last night I ran out and had to use my normal $12 grocery store brand. The flavor was way more balanced and less bitter. The expensive one just tasted like grass and made my mouth feel weird. Has anyone else had a 'fancy' ingredient that was a total letdown?

I thought the whole 'air fryer' thing was just a microwave for crunchy people, but my sister made some frozen fries in hers in Boise that were shockingly close to real diner food.

What's a food trend you were totally wrong about at first?

Serious question, who decided cilantro tastes like soap?

Honestly, I was at a taco truck in Austin last week and this guy next to me told the cook 'no cilantro, it tastes like soap to me' like it was a fact. Ngl, I looked it up later and it's a real gene thing, but it got me thinking. People who hate cilantro talk about it like it's a universal truth, but for the rest of us it's just a nice herb. It feels like it gets way too much hate for just doing its job. Has anyone else had a friend who acts like you're crazy for liking it?

Rant: My attempt at a 'perfect' sous vide steak ended in a soggy mess

Honestly, I followed a popular recipe for a 2-inch ribeye at 137 degrees for 2 hours, but the fat didn't render and the sear just steamed it. Tbh, I think the hype around sous vide for every cut is way overblown. Has anyone else had better luck with just a cast iron and a thermometer for a good ribeye?

Pro tip: I started adding a pinch of salt to my coffee grounds in Chicago last winter

It cuts the bitterness way down, so I don't need sugar anymore. Anyone else try this weird trick or am I just nuts?

Spent $60 on a 'gourmet' truffle oil that tastes like chemical cleaner

Bought a fancy bottle from a specialty store downtown because everyone online raves about it. Drizzled it on some fries like they said, and it tasted like straight-up Pledge furniture polish. The ingredient list was just olive oil and 'truffle aroma,' which is just a lab-made flavoring. Total scam for the price. Anyone know a legit brand that actually uses real truffles?

I finally tried a $15 avocado toast in Portland and it made me realize something

The whole thing was just okay, but the price tag made me see how overhyped simple foods can get when they're trendy. Now I just make my own at home for a fraction of the cost. Does anyone else think avocado toast gets way more praise than it actually deserves?

My friend bet me $20 that his fancy truffle oil pizza was better than my plain cheese slice from Tony's.

We did a blind taste test in my kitchen and three people picked the simple cheese slice because the truffle oil just tasted like weird perfume. Has anyone else had a 'gourmet' ingredient totally ruin a normal food for them?

My 'quick' attempt to get crispy chicken skin took 3 hours and a ruined pan

I followed a dozen online tips about drying, scoring, and high heat, but it just steamed and tore. Anyone have a foolproof method that doesn't involve a whole afternoon?